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CITY LIFE - MALE CALL
How’s Your Dating Pic IQ?
Seven tips for improving your dating site pictures
First off, the guiding principle is that your dating site is not your Facebook or Flickr page where you show your favorite party pix with your posse of BFFs and grandkids. Every picture has a job to do and that job is simply this: Give the guys a good idea who’s going to be showing up at Starbucks.
- Never have another person in the picture if you can possibly help it – especially, especially your BFF or besties. If the only decent pic of you includes your son, well, so be it, but there are so many things wrong with having another figure that it would take a whole column to explain. Please ladies…do not have pix of your girlfriends. Guaranteed, we’ll be checking them out instead of you. And if you have to say “That’s me, second from the left,” you can be sure the pic should be ditched.
Don’t use a grimacing, angry or sour picture. It’s amazing how many people have a perfectly fine set of pix and then screw it up with one really sour expression. Ask yourself: Would anyone want to date this person if that’s the only thing they saw? And if your headline says, “Happy fun-loving” make sure your main picture looks happy and fun-loving.- Don’t have a totally dark or grimy out-of-focus shot especially one that looks like a 20-year old Instamatic print. Tip: Check your profile from a friend’s computer because your monitor may be misleading.
- No shots of sunsets or world landmarks. This is not a personal slideshow of your life.
- Limit pix of pets. One is almost too much, but it’s OK if you want the world to know your dog is part of the deal; plus, it can be a conversation starter.
- No pix of your grandbabies…unless they’re coming to the first meeting too. Like No. 1 above, it’s just wrong on so many counts.
- Finally, avoid cell phone cam shots in mirrors. It’s OK to hold the camera out with your arm if you know the technique, but shots of you in your undies in the bathroom holding the phone send so many wrong signals that we’re appalled just thinking of them. Use the self-timer, find a friend, use a tripod. Anything else just looks desperate, as though no one likes you enough to take a picture of you.
- These are not just the usual arbitrary whims you’ve come to expect from the Male Call Advisory Board™. They’re based on strong evidence, some of which we didn’t even make up!
Remember, the main thing a guy wants to know is: Who is showing up for the meeting? Is it your girlfriends, your dog, your son, your grandbaby? No, it’s you. We can read that you have a wonderful son, that you’re devoted to your grandkids, that you’re an animal lover. Guys mainly just want to know what the person who is going to show up looks like for real. They don’t like surprises, like when you say you’re “petite” but what you really mean is “short.” You know what we mean, ladies.
Second, your profile real estate is limited. So like any good ad, every picture must pull its weight. If you have two nearly identical shots, ditch one. If you have a slightly unflattering pic, ditch it. If there’s a shot of you that doesn’t answer the question “who is showing up?” – ditch it. If you’re not interested in guys propositioning you for casual sex, ditch the lingerie shot and the downward-looking cleavage shot. Glamour studio shots: ditch ‘em.
And did we mention “No other people in the pic”?
Need a guy’s perspective? Jot a note to Male Call at jrobertpenn@aol.com or check out the Male call archives at www.words-in-action.com.